JoeTaxpayer

This is the fifth post in an 8 part series on being homeless, by a guest author who goes by the name Dreamscaper. It’s my honor to share his story with my readers.

I consider me surviving homelessness was only because of the good hearted friends and strangers who took care of me once they found out about my situation.

The first person to find out was a friend living in the dorms who offered to store my books I bought with me. There wasn’t anything he could do so he did what he could – he kept my stuff safe so I wouldn’t have to bury it or hide it.

The second person was the person who kicked me out of the dorms. Again, he couldn’t do much, so he did what he could. He is still on my friends list on my messenger program. I also had a few friends that took me in every so often when I needed a roof over my head. Sadly I don’t remember their names.

The first persons who did something were friends I used to play cards with to pass the time. They thought I was a student still. I was sleeping in the tv lounge and took a bottle of Advil. 30 minutes later I was throwing up outside. Another 30 minutes later was my 2nd trip. By the 3rd time I was greeted by a few friends and complete strangers. Apparently one friend realized something was wrong – really wrong, and made a few phone calls.

One person who showed up made sure to go to Taco Bell right before. He gave me some tacos saying “I didn’t know when was the last time you ate”. Of course at that point I wasn’t hungry. The Advil killed my appetite and by that point I was growing accustomed to not eating. As mentioned earlier, I lost about 100 pounds in 9 months, this including the times that my friends made sure I had plenty to eat when I was hungry. I don’t remember much of these days, but if I were to guess, I probably didn’t eat much besides chips, sunflower seeds, and whatever friends gave me. So when I wasn’t doing something with friends I wasn’t eating.

They fed me, sheltered me, and did what they could for me for a month or two. One person bought a blanket to make sure I had a warm blanket. I think someone bought some clothes for me. After the month or two, the friend I was living with and paying my portion of rent, his roommates had a problem with me being there. I didn’t want to cause problems with this room mates, so I left.

I stayed at someone’s house that was in that live action role playing game. I got kicked out for 2 reasons. First, I remember a roommate having one of those big boxes of cheese fish crackers. I never had those before, but boy, where they good! One handful turned into two, into a half dozen, turned into an empty box. I still feel guilty that I ate that persons cheese fish, but they were good, and at that point I wasn’t eating. To this day (15 years later?) I still can’t buy that box of crackers because I’ll eat the whole thing in one sitting. Second reason was someone had a problem I didn’t move the shower head back to some random position. Whenever I hop in the shower I make sure it’s at a “safe spot”. I kind of assume everyone does this. Apparently not.

Considering all the times I ate out of a trash can, slept on a toilet, and did what I could to “fit in” to make it seem like I was still a student, the shower was the best thing that ever happened. I remember after 4 months of being homeless I stayed with a friend. I remember just standing in the shower for 45 minutes.

Another friend from that live action game made sure to drive me around on her days off. She took me to get food stamps, took me to fast food places and waited for me to fill out applications. I needed a food handlers card for a fast food place and she took me there and waited for me to take the test.

What finally got me off the streets was a woman who showed interest in me. We went out on one date than offered to let me move in with her. I don’t know if she knew I was homeless or just moved fast. That night I searched the net for “Sex FAQ”. I was still a virgin. But it’s been 9 months about since I first became homeless and was willing to do anything to get a roof over my head. I stayed with her for 2.5 years, got engaged to her, and things fell apart. I found out the only reason she even talked to me because she was interested in one of my friends she hoped I’d introduce. I never did because I didn’t know.

Next Week – Aftermath

Another Sunday, another Roundup. Let’s start this week with the interesting, yet not-for-me Guide to Safe Dumpster Diving. As I commented at Bargaineering, I’m sometimes at the other side of this, leaving things outside that I know someone could use, a working TV, cabinet, bookcase, etc. There are things that charities wont take, but still have some use. Depending where you live, you might have a local swap at the town dump, or flea market you can sell these things at, but for us, a single item is often more trouble than it’s worth, and  to the curb it goes.

At Pants in a Can, we are treated to Two Million Dollar ideas. The first, I wonder, but the other idea is worth stealing, implementing and getting rich. Some people are always thinking, it seems.

The Financial Buff tells us that Most People Don’t Sell Everything In a Panic, which is good news. Buying high and selling low is the sure way to #investorfail and makes for a tough retirement.

Frugal Dad offers his spin on “don’t buy what you can’t afford” in his article this week titled No Payment for 90 Days – Delaying Ownership of Things You Cannot Afford. You’d think we’d know this by now, and yet those “pay later” ads are still running.

At No Debt Plan, Kevin offers a lesson in How to Fight for Your Children’s Financial Lives.  Some pretty sage advice we should all teach our young ones. There are always things they need to learn on their own, but teaching them the basics of finance is a great way to give the next generation a nice head start.

And to wrap it up this week – a Time Management Exercise at One Money Design.  So often we think about money, but forget how valuable our time is, and waste it away. Jennifer writes a great little exercise to get you back on track with your use of time, your most precious commodity.

In an op-ed piece in the New York Times, titled Stop Codling the Super-Rich, an interesting read in which he invites congress to up his tax burden along with others who can well afford it. Ironically, I didn’t hear a big round of applause when this was published.

This is the fourth post in an 8 part series on being homeless, by a guest author who goes by the name Dreamscaper. It’s my honor to share his story with my readers.

1. Eating out of garbage cans. I preferred half eaten bags of potato chips. If they were soggy they probably weren’t good. If they were crunchy they were probably fine. I hung out when the vending machines were changed. Sometimes the changer would give me left over snacks or snacks they couldn’t pack. I’m not sure if they suspected I was homeless and hungry. Most everyone else, including my closest friends, assumed I was still a student. Though they wouldn’t know that I was previously a student so all they saw was someone looking hungry at a vending machine.

Homeless Christ by Deb Hoeffner

2. I ended up joining any clubs on campus I could. The idea simply being that I needed to fill my waking hours with something to do until I could find a place I felt safe. The club I remembered most fondly was a life action role playing club. Eventually they somehow knew I was going through hard times. To “play” was a $5 fee. I don’t remember if my fee was waved or someone covered it for me. Either way, the money collected went towards pizza, soda, chips, whatever, after the sessions. I ate well. Sometimes we’d go to a 24 hour dennys to eat and talk about whatever happened during the session. I always had a couple friends that said I should order anything I wanted. One friend said he did this for a friend at a bar and they rung up a $100 bar tab together and it was good. I didn’t feel guilty asking for a burger and fries those nights.

3. Nights that I couldn’t find a building to sleep in I’d recycle cans from garbage cans that weren’t cleaned yet. Also, on weekends, I’d go through all the chairs and sofas where I was to pick up loose change. One day I pocketed $8. Every weekend wasn’t this great because it was only a week since “last cleaning”. This money I either used to watch a movie on the first showing at a theater on Sunday and try to stay in the building as long as possible. So the food I did get on my own I stole from stores. I preferred those nickel candies you pay when you take it. so I’d fill up my pockets. I also preferred shell less sunflower seeds. Nice size bag that would last all day and I could steal or pay for cheap.

One night I was sitting at a 24 hour Denny’s, pretending to study, when a homeless person sat next to me. He ended up giving me his address and drew a map on a napkin if “I was ever lonely”. Months later, I was hungry and wanted a roof over my head. I walked to his address and was yards to his door. Here I was…questioning my own sexuality and morality and willing to put everything aside in hopes of something to eat and a roof over my head for a night.

The money I did make recycling cans and finding in sofas was typically used for Sunday movies or to buy smokes. I never smoked before being homeless, but I wanted an excuse of why I was out at midnight on campus. Going for a smoke break and a stroll seemed like a good excuse. Luckily, I was never asked. During that time I started a pack a day habit that took 8 years to break cold turkey and another 6 years to stop having smoking dreams.

(Editor’s note – I am in debt to the artist Deb Hoeffner who permitted me to use the image above. You can see and purchase her beautiful artwork at her site DebHoeffner.com. This image is not in the public domain and may not be reproduced or copied.)

Next Week – Getting Rescued